Guy Talk
by staticradar
Summary: Weiss and Vaughn Talk
1. Guy Talk

Title: Guy Talk  
  
Author: Kristen  
  
Disclaimers: Don't own, don't sue.  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Synopsis: Agent Vaughn and Agent Weiss have a little "Guy Talk"  
  
Distribution: Lean Into Me site any others just tell me where...  
  
Feedback: PLEASE!!! I THRIVE ON IT!!  
  
  
  
"You wanted to see me Agent Vaughn?"  
  
"Agent Weiss, come in, close the door and take a seat. I have something important to discuss with you."  
  
"Shoot."  
  
"Ok, we've known each other for quite a few years now and I consider us friends as well as colleagues."  
  
"So do I Vaughn."  
  
"I respect your opinion."  
  
"What is it? Oh wait let me guess, cute little double agent?"  
  
"What is wrong with me?" Vaughn sat on the edge of his desk and put his head in his hands.  
  
"You're just a red blooded Man. I've noticed a lot of talk about the young Miss Bristow." Vaughn's head shot up as he cast an angry glance at his friend  
  
"Talk, what kind of talk?"  
  
"Woah, calm down there, nothing you haven't thought a million times."  
  
"That's what I'm afraid of."  
  
"So, what about Alice."  
  
"What about her? We broke up months ago, you know that."  
  
"I know, and you weren't broken up at all about it."  
  
"We weren't meant to be. She could never accept me or what I do. My job is important for me and I take it very seriously."  
  
"Don't I know it. Especially when it comes to Sydney."  
  
"She's...I can't quite put my finger on it. She's just unlike any woman I've ever encountered in my life."  
  
"Hey, she got you this new swanky office." Vaughn shook his head and laughed.  
  
"Yeah, there's that too. She doesn't take crap from anyone, I really admire that."  
  
"Yeah she has the balls to stand up to you."  
  
"Oh when I first was assigned to her, god I thought she was arrogant, but beautiful and I was captivated. What the hell is wrong with me?!" He shouted almost causing Weiss to jump.  
  
"Ok, first sit down and breathe, calm down there, buddy. She's just a girl."  
  
"That's just it, she's not, just a girl I mean. She's everything I've ever wanted and more."  
  
"Vaughn, you know it can't happen."  
  
"Yeah, I know, but that doesn't stop me from wanting it...her."  
  
"Devlin would have your ass and Sydney's. You'd jeopardize this job that you say means so much to you."  
  
"I know, I know. My head knows all this, but try telling that to my heart. Oh god, how cheesy was that."  
  
"Pretty cheesy man, this girls got you turning into Wisconsin cheddar here."  
  
"So how do I just turn off my feelings?"  
  
"Well focus on the things you hate about her. You said she was arrogant when you first met, try that."  
  
"Yeah, but now her arrogance is almost cute. She's head strong, I like that."  
  
"Alright, man, you are not making this easy. Well at least your not IN love with her yet, that could get messy." Vaughn looked down at the ground almost ashamed. "Vaughn, tell me your not in love with Sydney."  
  
"I could, but I'd be lying."  
  
"Wow, you are truly in love with your agent?"  
  
"Yeah, I am."  
  
"Under any other circumstances I'd say 'go get 'em man, but this is complicated."  
  
"Now you see my dilemma."  
  
"Well have you told Sydney?"  
  
"Oh, god no, what do you think I am an idiot?"  
  
"Well..."  
  
"That was rhetorical Weiss."  
  
"Does she have any clue?"  
  
"I think she does, I mean I gave her a Christmas present."  
  
"Well did she like it?"  
  
"I don't know, all this stuff with her dad and him getting her out of SD- 6's prison came up. Then she went to Havana to try and save him and bring back Hassan, I don't even know if she opened it."  
  
"What did you get her."  
  
"An antique picture frame."  
  
"Nice, not to personal, but lets her know you put some thought into it. Smooth man. Anything else?"  
  
"Remember when Syd was being suspected of being a mole and she was given that lie detector test?"  
  
"Yeah, vaguely, I'm not on her case."  
  
"Well, I was helping her get ready for it. I asked if she was romantically interested in anyone."  
  
"You didn't!"  
  
"I did." He laughed and Weiss looked at him with awe.  
  
"Balls of Steel man, what did she say?"  
  
"She said no, but the machine went up to like 56, so she was lying. And they way she looked at me was almost embarrassed, so I think she was talking about me."  
  
"Well that's a possibility."  
  
"Possibility?"  
  
"Well maybe she likes someone else and was embarrassed for you to find out, because she knows of your crush on her."  
  
"I never thought of that." He thought for a moment then shook his head. "Nah, the way she looked at me, it had to be me she was referring to."  
  
"So have you talked about anything regarding your relationship or lack there of?"  
  
"No, it's usually business as usual with us, we try to get a little personal time, but you know it's hard to actually hang out outside of work ya know?"  
  
"Yeah, I wish I could help you."  
  
"So I'm right back where I started."  
  
"Looks that way, but if you ever need a friendly ear, look no further."  
  
"Thanks man." Weiss clasped Vaughn's hand and turned to leave.  
  
"Hey, Vaughn, you want my advice?"  
  
"Yeah, of course."  
  
"Tell her what you told me. Devlin be damned. Just don't get all cheesy on me ever again you here?"  
  
"Thanks. Now, get back to work Agent Weiss." Vaughn's Cell phone rang.  
  
"You too." Weiss left Vaughn's Office as Vaughn answered his cell phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Vaughn it's me, we need to talk."  
  
THE END 


	2. More Guy Talk

Title: More Guy Talk  
  
Part 2 of Guy Talk  
  
Summary: Weiss and Vaughn talk about Syd  
  
Spoilers: Up to and including Q&A  
  
Authors Note: I'm liking writing for Weiss and I love their dynamic that I think I'm gonna keep this an on going series.  
  
Feedback: YES PLEASE!!!! I live and breathe Feedback!!  
  
Distribution: Sure take it, just tell me where!  
  
************  
  
"Vaughn, what's up?" Agent Weiss flops down in the chair in front of Vaughn's desk.  
  
"God, everything."  
  
"Bristow again, am I right? Of course I'm right, who else could it be?"  
  
"Just a lot has gone in the past few months, hell in the past few weeks."  
  
"'The Prophecy,' you mean?" He finger quoted the words "the prophecy."  
  
"Yes, you know I broke into the Vatican with her."  
  
"Again, balls of steel."  
  
"It's not like that, I just can't seem to say no to her, if she asked me to jump off a bridge I'd probably say, 'Which one?'"  
  
"Ok, I retract the balls of steel moniker, you are ball-less, without balls."  
  
"I have balls."  
  
"Not when it comes to Bristow."  
  
"I have balls."  
  
"Yeah, sure you do."  
  
"I HAVE BALLS!" He stood up and shouted, only to notice his secretary in the doorway." Weiss tried to stifle a laugh at her beat red face.  
  
"Mr...mr...Vaughn, you have a-a c-call on line one." She stuttered timidly before retreating out of the office.  
  
"Great, now my secretary thinks I'm nuts."  
  
"You are nuts, you just don't have any." Vaughn shot him an evil look as he picked up the phone.  
  
"Vaughn speaking."  
  
"Vaughn? It's Sydney."  
  
"Syd, what's wrong? Where are you?"  
  
"I'm on a secure line, so I only have a minute, literally."  
  
"Talk fast."  
  
"I think my mother's alive."  
  
"Woah, that's huge, are you sure?"  
  
"I can't get into it now, just meet me at our usual place in an hour."  
  
"Yeah sure."  
  
"Bye, see you in an hour."  
  
"An hour, bye."  
  
"What was that?" Weiss asked as Vaughn hung up the phone.  
  
"Sydney, she has some shocking news about her mother, but she couldn't get into it." Weiss nodded, before getting back to the subject at hand.  
  
"Are you gonna tell her?"  
  
"Not, now, she's going through too much as it is."  
  
"God, grow a spine or a..."  
  
"Don't say it, I swear to god if you say it I'm telling Haladki that you want to go to Pizza with him after work."  
  
"Now that's just cruel."  
  
"Don't tempt me."  
  
"You wouldn't."  
  
"Wouldn't I?" Weiss considered this for a moment.  
  
"Fine, I won't say it anymore, but that's just wrong and goes way beyond cruel and unusual punishment, which I think there is a law against in our fine US constitution which we are here to uphold."  
  
"I know."  
  
"You are a sick sick man." There was a long pause and Vaughn flashed a wicked grin.  
  
"Say it."  
  
"What, you just forbid me too..."  
  
"Not that, I want to hear you say it or I will call Haladki in right now. Say 'I have balls.'"  
  
"I have balls." Weiss deadpanned, Vaughn just rolled his eyes.  
  
"Say, 'Vaughn has balls, big ones.'"  
  
"I'm not saying that." Vaughn picks up the phone and Weiss picks it out of his hand and hangs it up.  
  
"Fine, Fine, Vaughn has the biggest balls I've ever seen." Vaughn busts out laughing and Weiss looks behind him to see the blushing young women who was Vaughn's secretary.  
  
"I'm not even gonna ask." She stated before quickly putting a stack of papers on Vaughn's desk and making a hasty exit.  
  
"Great she's probably going to call Barnett on me."  
  
"Hey it's better than Haladki getting her on you for being 'emotionally attached' to Bristow. Which I can't blame you, the girl is hot."  
  
"She's much more than 'hot'."  
  
"You have eyes, you had to have noticed how gorgeous she is."  
  
"Of course I've noticed, but that's not why I like her and you know it."  
  
"You much more than like her." He smiled and started to sing tauntingly, "Vaughn and Sydney sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G..."  
  
"And how old are you now 3?"  
  
"Talk to her man, what's the worst that could happen."  
  
"She could slap me or kick me in the region you keep saying I don't have and ask to be reassigned to a new handler, and someone like Lambert will get her and then I'll be so unsettled I'll quit my job and become a homeless bum on the street."  
  
"See, that's not so bad. All the fresh air you could ever need. And what's the best that could happen."  
  
"She could kiss me like there's no tomorrow and we live happily ever after until SD-6 finds us and has us killed."  
  
"Ok, not the best of scenarios, anyone ever tell you, you are way too pessimistic?"  
  
"So you really think I should tell her?"  
  
"Definitely man, you need to be honest, if you want to have any kind of relationship with the girl."  
  
"You're right." Vaughn grabs his coat.  
  
"You're gonna tell her right now?"  
  
"What am I crazy, no, I'm gonna wait for the timing to be a little better." Vaughn walks past him. "If you'll excuse me I'm off to meet my agent." Weiss rolled his eyes as Vaughn left the office.  
  
"Ball-less." Vaughn poked his head back in the office.  
  
"I heard that." Weiss smiled and shook his head and hoped against hope that Vaughn wouldn't follow through with his threat. 


End file.
